An awful lot to think about

Column originally published Sept. 21, 2005

Dear Mom:

I know there's been an awful lot to think about since your dad died on Friday. I've been thinking plenty myself, pretty much in circles, so I think writing is the best way to sort my brain out.

I can't begin to put myself in your shoes. I know things weren't always the best with him, but our family still has been much closer than many we've both encountered. And no matter what, I always knew how much he loved us. He even got good at saying it, something not everyone can accomplish.

Looking back at just the good times would be the easy way out, although there were plenty of good times. He always made sure the whole family was together around Christmas, always made a point of visiting us every summer, even though it meant traveling from Connecticut or Florida. He was generous, buying us everything from a toaster oven to a new bathroom. I'll never forget how his help allowed me to go to the college of my choice.

And there were so many moments that defined him in my eyes. The guy put the ruff in gruff, from swearing at the Atlanta Falcons during the NFL playoffs to just snarling at people because he thought it was fun. Eyes rolled plenty of times, of course, but it's still sad to know his distinctive voice is silenced forever.

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