Attention ex-Kohawks

Michael David Smith of FootballOutsiders.com must have done his homework before writing this paragraph about fellow Coe grad Marv Levy (a contemporary of my grandmother):

Why are the Bills infatuated with Ohio State defensive backs? After reaching for Donte Whitner in the first round, they grabbed Ashton Youboty, a cornerback who many (though not me) considered a first-round talent with the 70th pick overall. Youboty is an insurance policy against a potential holdout by Nate Clements, who attended — you guessed it — Ohio State. The Buckeyes had a great defense last year, so it's not like Levy is drafting a bunch of guys from Coe College, but enough's enough. Maybe Levy believes that a secondary full of Buckeye alums will be extra motivated when facing ex-Michigan quarterback Tom Brady.

Read the whole column here.

Two years in and still learning

Column originally published April 26, 2006

I learned a lot in the first 104 weeks of my son’s life, which we marked Sunday with a delightfully scaled-down birthday party.

I learned it is best, if at all possible, to schedule your child’s first birthday party for the day right before large-item pickup week so you can just haul all the empty boxes straight to the curb.

I learned that I remain faster and stronger than a toddler, but am not necessarily able to think like a toddler.

I learned our refrigerator magnets fit nicely into the air vent in our bathroom, that walking in a straight line is overrated and that our cats are too dumb to hide or hiss.

I learned it takes forever to open Christmas presents when the child insists on tearing off a tiny piece of wrapping paper and then running into the kitchen to put the scrap into the garbage can.

Continue reading "Two years in and still learning."

Baby update

I suppose, since Jack turns two today, that it's time to retire the "Baby update" header and move to "Toddler update." Consider it done.

I'll give a quick tale about Jack's birthday party later this week (quick snippet: I make the cupcakes, Kristie accidentally bought trick candles), but for now let's just rejoice in the fact that we've been able to sustain human life for two whole years.

Believe me, going back to the day that purplish-gooey thing came into the world until the present, when he shrieks and says my name when I come home (and also "honk" because that's the sound my car makes when it locks), two years of life is a pretty amazing feat.

Time Killer

I thought about linking to this when I saw it a few months ago, but I thought everyone would have seen it somewhere else. Since it cropped up again in this Tribune story about the technique, here is... Brokeback to the Future.

Time Killer

Got some time to kill? Check out this list of the "Top 15 Strangest Coincidences." I'm intrigued by this one:

The British actor Anthony Hopkins [who shot to fame as Hannibal Lecter] was delighted to hear that he had landed a leading role in a film based on the book The Girl From Petrovka by George Feifer. A few days after signing the contract, Hopkins travelled to London to buy a copy of the book. He tried several bookshops, but there wasn't one to be had. Waiting at Leicester Square underground for his train home, he noticed a book apparently discarded on a bench. Incredibly, it was The Girl From Petrovka. That in itself would have been coincidence enough but in fact it was merely the beginning of an extraordinary chain of events. Two years later, in the middle of filming in Vienna, Hopkins was visited by George Feifer, the author. Feifer mentioned that he did not have a copy of his own book. He had lent the last one - containing his own annotations - to a friend who had lost it somewhere in London. With mounting astonishment, Hopkins handed Feifer the book he had found. 'Is this the one?' he asked, 'with the notes scribbled in the margins?' It was the same book.

Trust me, some of the others are just as good.

[Expletive deleted]

Let's just say I haven't been in a very good baseball mood since Wednesday night, and especially since we learned Thursday that Derrek Lee will be out eight to 10 weeks.

When you're rolling over in the middle of the night and thinking things like "I wonder if Fred McGriff can still hit..." you know your team has a problem. And without Derrek Lee, the Cubs have a huge problem.

Remember two weeks ago, when the Barrett grand slam against the Cards (this weekend's opponent, coincidentally) was the best possible outcome? Well, this Lee injury is about the worst possible outcome. The only good thing is that he isn't dead.

The Trib's Rick Morrisey offers today these non-consoling words:

More than anything, it's too bad. The season is only 14 games old, but this already looked like it was going to be a fun team to watch -— certainly more fun than the product that had been on the field the previous two years. Juan Pierre gives the Cubs a legitimate leadoff hitter for the first time in a while, as well as a legitimate threat to steal a base.

And Lee and Aramis Ramirez had actual baserunners to knock in. Now there's just a big hole where there used to be one of the best hitters in baseball. This isn't like Rose Mary Woods erasing 18½ minutes of a Nixon tape. This is eight weeks, minimum, without one of the best hitters in baseball.

Think Ramirez is going to see many good pitches? Think again.

Lee also happens to be one of the top two or three defensive first basemen in the major leagues, as the Cubs will find out when shortstop Ronny Cedeno's wild throws go for regular joy rides.

I think I'm going to be sick.

Read the rest of Morrisey's column here.

Looking back on days gone by

Column originally published April 19, 2006

Flunk Day is tomorrow.

Those four words are music to the ears of any person who attended Coe College at any time since 1911. Flunk Day is a rite of spring for Kohawks, who for the past 95 years have taken one day each spring semester to skip class as an entire campus community. The day is declared by the outgoing president of the student senate and is pretty much the highlight of the academic year.

Every April, I think fondly back on my four Flunk Days and wish there were some way for the working world to embrace the concept. As an adult, of course, I realize that would be impossible, especially since we depend on so many businesses to be open around the clock (hospitals, grocery stores, gas stations and so on). And maybe that understanding is what makes me appreciate Flunk Day all the more.

Continue reading "Looking back on days gone by."

More yet

This is the text of a petition/letter from the Flunk Day opponents.

Attention ex-Kohawks

HEY! There's a Flunk Day controversy a-brewing. I don't have to time write more, but click here for one student's take on the situation (including a picture of the highly suggestive Flunk Day shirt.)

Idol watch

Clearly after Tuesday night's butchering of one of my favorite rock songs (Queen's "Fat Bottomed Girls"), Bucky had to get the boot. I'll miss him as a character, but as a singer he sucked pretty hard. It's too bad he made it this far while Will (the babyfaced kid from Texas in the crowd at tonight's show) didn't even make the top 12.

Also, Chris should have sang "Under Pressue" last night. It would have been good enough to win him the whole competition.

Fixing baseball's schedule quirks

Column originally published April 12, 2006

Now that we’re in the fourth week of the “new look” Clinton Herald, as well as the second week of the Major League Baseball season, I thought it would be a good time to meld the two concepts and do some redesigning of the sports landscape.

This topic stems from a conversation I had with my dad a few weeks ago at the dining room table at my parents’ house in Libertyville, Ill.

The way interleague play is set up in baseball really bugs my father. As one of the 19 remaining NBA fans, my dad appreciates the way that league handles its unbalanced schedule.

You play four games each against the teams from your division, three or four each against the other teams in the conference and two each with the teams from the opposite conference, for a total of 82.

(Far too many games, by the way, if the playoffs are going to be a six-week process. Don’t we know who the best eight teams are by now?)

Under that system, teams generally have the same amount of games against common opponents. This is a more fair system than what baseball has established...

Continue reading "Fixing baseball's schedule quirks."

Attention ex-Libertyvillians

The Daily Herald again chimes in on the Brainerd saga, this time with a Q&A segment. A sample:

Q. What is the village’s plan for the site?

A. Libertyville officials want to turn it over to Peron’s preservation group, which has proposed spending millions to renovate the buildings and turn them into a community center that could host athletic events, theatrical performances, high school programs and other activities.

Read it all here.

This Week(end) in baseball

Just because I'm not writing much about baseball doesn't mean I'm not watching. I am watching, and it's fantastic.

Of course, it's easy for me to say that when the Cubs have just completed a three-game sweep of the Cardinals, capped with a dramatic eighth-inning grand slam from Michael Barrett that sent an already buzzing crowd over the edge.

ESPN.com's Sports Guy (link at right) often writes about the element of following sports that I experienced last night. In that situation, with the bases loaded and no one out, the Cubs down 4-3, the best possible outcome is for Barrett to hit a rocket onto Waveland Avenue. I would have settled for many, many things, of course. A double to the gap, a weak single, a double play that still got the tying run across -- anything. But when the best possible result is actually what happens, it's unreal.

I've been watching the Cubs for about 20 years, so I can tell with some certainty that, at least offensively, this is not how things work out for the boys in blue. Sure, if I'm pulling hard for a Cubs pitcher to get a strikeout, I have a decent chance of seeing the desired result. But offensively? Let's put it this way: If I was betting on the outcome of the play, and the choices were "Barrett hits a grand slam" or "Barrett hits into an unassisted triple play" (an outcome so unusual that Rafael Furcal's UATP is in the "Sunday Night Baseball" opening credits), I'd be forced to take option B.

That alone is why true fans get so much out of a game, because they've seen enough to know the possibilities. When the almost impossible actually happens, that's when sports lifts you to a higher place. That's also why, as soon as Barrett launched the ball, I jumped up from my chair, made a noise that woke up my lovely wife dozing on the couch, picked Jack up off the floor and said "Son, this is why we are baseball fans."

Then I learn today, via the Tribune, that Barrett's weekend "included a tornado that sent a tree crashing into his suburban Atlanta home on Friday.

'Bittersweet,' he said of his weekend, adding that his parents kept the news of the tornado damage from him until Saturday night." Crazy.

FYI, read the rest of that story here, or click here to read the Trib story about Jacque Jones getting his first hit of the year (a three-run homer) that includes this quote from Dusty Baker: "The main thing is he's trying so hard he's not swinging at strikes," Baker said before the streak was halted. "They're not getting him out, he's getting himself out. I talked to him about that. It's like fishing, you've got to get that first one in the boat and once you do, you've got the skunk out of the boat."

What? Is it any wonder why the media can't get its collective brain around that guy?

A few other things about baseball.

One, I had the MLB Extra Innings free preview last week on the Dish. Let's just say it's a good thing I can't afford that for the entire season, because I think my wife might move out.

Two, if you ever want to see specific plays from specific games, log on to a team's official site (for example, Cubs.com), then click on Multimedia and the "searchable video" link. Though I didn't need to enter this much data, I was able to indicate the following:

Chicago Cubs > Right-handed Hitters > vs St. Louis Cardinals > All Pitchers > Home Runs > Most Recent Game > Bases Loaded > 8th Inning > Wrigley Field

...which led to this page, from which you can click on a link to watch the grand slam mentioned earlier. Of course, you have to pay a fee to use this service, and I haven't the cash to do that (or the broadband connection to make it worth my while), but it's still pretty freaking neat.

Failing that, you can troll around and find this page of the team's recent highlights and get the video from there, at no cost, in three different sizes.

I think that's all I have for now. Deep apologies to the Cardinals fans who were subjected to this post. Note, however, the lack of gloating over the sweep in favor of sheer appreciation of the moment. You can't gloat in April.

No such thing as secrets on the Internet

Column originally published April 5, 2006

And so it has come to Clinton.

The debate over what students post on the Internet, or otherwise document, and how that information should be handled by parents, administrators and the law was bound to end up in 52732 at some point. It just so happens that this is the month and MySpace is the forum.

It didn’t have to be MySpace, of course. It could have been Facebook, Blogspot or even a video tape that landed in the wrong hands. Who can forget the famous video of the hazing rituals carried out at an unofficial powder puff football game in suburban Chicago?

The issue is very simple: What are people younger than 18 allowed to do and how much of that decision is based on when and where they do it?

Continue reading "No such thing as secrets on the Internet"

Wise Words

ESPN.com's Tim Keown: "Calling (Mark) McGwire more media friendly than (Barry) Bonds is like saying Kevin Garnett is short because he's not as tall as Yao Ming."

Read more here.

Will the real Chicago please stand up?

I don't have too much to add to this RedEye article about new TV series set in Chicago that obviously are not filmed in Chicago, but it is a decent, quick read.

For example:

In ABC's "Freddie," the Wrigley Building is right outside the main character's apartment. The problem? The character lives in Lake Point Tower, which is off Lake Shore Drive, not Michigan Avenue.

In the WB's new "Modern Men," a character talked about meeting at Rosebud. Only he mentioned the wrong Rosebud.

"We were trying to reference the steakhouse just off of Michigan Avenue, not the Italian place," co-creator Ross McCall said. "Whatever ended up being on tape was wrong."

"Pepper Dennis," a WB drama starring Rebecca Romijn that premieres at 8 p.m. Tuesday, does little to make Chicago a major presence in the show. When it does, it usually makes mistakes, such as a woman's suitcase that bears an address tag saying she lives in "Wrigleyville, IL."

At least there are no visible mountains.

"It was horrible," said "The Loop" co-creator Will Gluck, who was mortified upon learning mountains could be seen in a shot that was supposed to take place at O'Hare.

If you like that much, you'll enjoy the rest.

Time Killer

Are you curious about what strange habits other people have when going to the bathroom?

Fill out the Bathroom Habits Survey and find out.

Your answers are completely anonymous. After you complete the survey, you will see the survey results.